10 September 2009

2009 Week 1 Picks

Sing it with me, now:

It's the most wonderful time of the year! It's the most wonderful time of the year!

How do we survive the long lonely months between the pro bowl and opening weekend? I do not know, fellow football fans, but I sure am glad it's over.

Eagles/Panthers: I know it's the first game, and it seems cruel to do it, but I'm picking us to lose. I think our offense is likely to be pretty high-powered this season, but I also think they haven't quite gotten the kinks worked out yet. Also, as goeagles99 points out, things are still in flux (big time) 5 days before our first game. I also think our young group of defenders needs a little more time together to start working smoothly. Look for a rough first few weeks, facing two of the tough NFC South teams, regrouping during our early bye, and a kick-ass weeks 5-17.

Steelers/Titans: Other teams have no shot against the AFC North. Well, unless they're playing the Browns. Or the Bengals. Actually, it's just the Steelers and Ravens that are trouble. Which is bad news for the Titans. Steelers.

Dolphins/Falcons: It's so hard picking winners at this point, since we haven't really seen the teams in action yet. Coin flip says Falcons.

Broncos/Bengals: OK, even not having seen much of the teams yet, this one's not hard to pick. Broncos.

Vikings/Browns: Nor this one, even with Vicodin Boy at the helm. Vikings.

Jets/Texans: Based on my no doubt crackpot theory that this is their breakout year, Texans.

Jaguars/Colts: Colts. (Watch it, this will be the year the Jaguars finally pull it together. If it happens, you heard it here first. If not, we never had this conversation.)

Lions/Saints: I suppose since I picked them to win NFC North, I should go with the Lions. Hmmmmm.....Saints.

Cowboys/Bucs: Cowboys. They're a bunch of tools, but all is not well in Tampa Bay.

Chiefs/Ravens: Ravens. See above re: other teams' chances against the Ravens and/or Steelers.

49ers/Cardinals: Oh my God. We still have to suffer through divisional NFC West games! Can't someone fix this? Cardinals.

Skins/Giants: I think the Skins are going to surprise the Giants who are, as I'd mentioned, fresh out of receivers.

Rams/Seahawks: GAHHH! More NFC West! I'm going with Rams, just for the hell of it.

Bears/Packers: Packers. Look out for Jay Cutler to pout.

Bills/Patriots: Patriots. You don't have to look out for TO to pout - trust me, you won't be able to miss it.

Chargers/Raiders: Raiders, I had your back until you cut my boy Jeff Garcia. Chargers.

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