27 October 2014

Heartbreak in the Desert

Eagles 20, Cardinals 24, Sunday, October 26, 2014

A haiku for Nick Foles:

Nick Foles, back foot throws
Excruciating to watch
Please Nick, will you stop?

Stud of the week: Jeremy Maclin. Damn, yo. Mac came to BALL OUT.  Best game of his season?
You know it! He's definitely back as in all the way back from that ACL last year. 12 receptions, 187 yards, two touchdowns (that would be BOTH of the Eagles' touchdowns), and several clutch catches at key moments, particularly during the final drive. Taking that one year deal is looking smart. He keeps playing like this, and Jeff Lurie's going to have to open his wallet. WIDE. (Did you notice that he's actually playing better than DJax? Because pretty much everyone else has, so I don't want you to be left out.)

Also, shout out to Cody "All I do is kick 50+ yard field goals "Parkey (you should see his monogram).

And then there was this:


Not only did he play great, he provided a much-needed moment of levity in an otherwise agonizing game to watch.

Actually, that's not strictly true. The D played pretty well. The Cards are leading the NFC West and the Eagles were playing them on the road. Other than the two big TD receptions (Fitz and the game winner to John Brown), they did quite a good job. That's a BIG "other than" of course, but credit where credit is due.

Of course, I also remember yelling "somebody cover Fitz!" about a million times. And by "somebody" I mean you Nate Allen. And you Cary Williams. Both of you were an embarrassment to midnight green yesterday. PARTICULARLY YOU NATE ALLEN. You BETTER be having nightmares involving John Brown for a long goddamn time.

But the offense (other than Mac). Oh my God, the offense. And it actually wasn't all of the offense. It was the red zone offense, which was dreadful. Including the final drive of the game, four trips to the red zone = three points. THREE. That is not going to cut it. The Josh Huff fumble. The Nick Foles pick. The Chris Polk TD that wasn't - and wasn't challenged (THAT WAS TOTALLY A TOUCHDOWN). I haz a sad.

Speaking of sad, I don't have enough time to talk about how bad the officiating was, other than to say that it was pretty much equally bad (11 penalties on the Eagles, 10 on the Cards), but they were throwing so many flags I'm amazed the game is actually over at this point. I was sure the teams would still by playing into Monday Night Football. I did notice that there was no replay on a number of the penalties I'm guessing BECAUSE THEY WERE IMAGINARY.

Although: how does that horse collar of Riley Cooper end up with the flag picked up? How does Deone Bucannon not get penalized, ejected, and fined? Still, I don't want to be a whiny crybaby, aka Bruce Arians.

I quote Tommy Lawlor: "Too many mistakes. Simple as that."

He's not wrong.

Also? Seriously, Nick. No more back foot throws. I am not joking.

And Chip? Maybe next time on 4th-and-goal from the less than one? Maybe try a QB sneak with your SIX AND A HALF FOOT TALL QB.

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