02 November 2006

2006 Week 9 Picks

OK, I guarantee you the Eagles will not lose this week. We've been finding new, creative, previously unseen, unknown, and un-thought-of ways to lose, but we will not lose this week.

Shoegal and I were talking and we realized that it actually is all her fault. She was out of the country the last three Sundays. The week of the Giants game? Out-of-state triathalon. I think we're cool, though - she doesn't have any more travel planned during football season. Or at least she won't once I cancel all her reservations and hide her car keys.

In the other matchups...

Falcons/Lions: need I state the obvious? Lions all the way, baby! Not really.

The Bengals/Ravens game looked like it would be good at the start of the season. Now? Not so much. Ocho Cinco can talk all he wants, but Ray Lewis IS his daddy.

One NFC East team has solved its QB problem, and sadly, it's not the Redskins. Worse news for the Skins? Clinton Portis, Santana Moss, and Antwaan Randle El all missed at least one day of practice this week due to sore whatevers. Stupid Cowboys are going up on us by a game.

The Giants, on the other hand, are going up on us by 2 games. They won the division last year! Why are they getting to play the Texans? Shouldn't they have to play the Colts, like, every week?

The Packers/Bills game...eh. Doesn't even come up to the standards of Most Painful Game of the Week. Actually, that will probably be the Skins/Cowboys game, not least because I'll be watching it with Deadhead Skins Fan. Also see above re: their entire offense being injured.

I should be more excited about the Chiefs/Rams game, but I'm still stuck on the impending slaughter at Fed Ex Field. Oh all right, I'll pick. Figure the Chiefs to win due to being 4-3 in the AFC (rather than NFC) West.

This week, it's the Dolphins turn to get totally destroyed at Soldier Field! I must've been blitzed out of my mind when I picked the Dolphins to win AFC East.

Look for the Saints to resume their winning ways, as they punish the Bucs by proxy for daring to beat us. At least if it's a billion degrees in Tampa Bay, the Saints should be OK. They'll be wanting kegs of Abita rather than Gatorade for the sidelines, but they should be fine.

The Jags lost to the Texans and then beat us. I think that means they're due to lose to the Titans. Good news for one Mr. Vince Young!

Aw - poor Vikings. You had such a rough time last week! Here, have a nice easy win against the hapless 49ers.

The Browns, on the other hand are being punished for their win against the Jets by having to face the Chargers. Yeah, that winning streak's going to end at 1.

Things are not looking up for the Steelers, either, as they host the Broncos this week. Last year, the Steelers started slow, too. But they weren't 2-5 going into week 9. This tail spin is looking terminal.

Everyone's saying the Colts/Pats game will be an AFC Championship preview. Yeah, right. They may beat the Pats Sunday night, but the Colts are not making it to the AFC Championship game. Bank on it.

Raiders/Seahawks - who decided to put this dog on MNF? And in fact with the Seahawks missing Hasselbeck and Alexander, this is going to be an ever bigger dog than it looked going into the season. Fortunately, I have to pack for a business trip Monday night.

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